how to get Member id as early parsed variable?

I’m having some trouble using the {logged_in_member_id} tag as a variable.

I’m trying to display some entries depending on whether the members ID is allowed to view them (the ids are set in a text input field, updated when needs be via channel form).

No matter what I do I can’t get the member ID early enough for my conditionals to use it. I’ve tried using the tag on it’s own, stash and embed:. The conditional will work if i specify an ID but not if I try to get it dynamically

any ideas?