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How to Build self Confiedence?

August 01, 2008 10:33am

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  • #1 / Aug 01, 2008 10:33am

    srobet

    53 posts

    In online forums. I can be a bigmouth person, talking about everything, give the argue, not agree with others and many more I can do. I felt what I think in my head flown into my hand directly in Miliseconds.

    But, in real world forums, I become a little quite man, sit on back, and just agree what forums did. Afraid to told what I want, my expression meets other expression felt so terrible for me. I couldn’t handle when some people talk in high tone. And then, I just shut up my mouth again, went back to my chair, agree whatever they said even I disagree.


    PS: Sorry for my English.

  • #2 / Aug 01, 2008 10:58am

    frenzal

    136 posts

    getting drunk should do the trick

  • #3 / Aug 01, 2008 11:07am

    srobet

    53 posts

    I’ve try it, and made me sleep. 😊

  • #4 / Aug 01, 2008 1:33pm

    Tom Glover

    493 posts

    getting drunk should do the trick

    Works for me, most people think im quite in the real world, except when im drunk.

  • #5 / Aug 01, 2008 8:16pm

    sikkle

    325 posts

    I think we should give a real answer here.

    Not realy related to this kind of forum though.

    Most of the time confidence come within the quality of your work. When you feel confident about what you do, you get it easier to show your talent indeed.

    Don’t be surprise man to see many many people talking out loud be realy quiet in real life, that is one problem, but on the long run, competence matters the most.

    This is my two cent indeed.

    good luck !

  • #6 / Aug 01, 2008 8:29pm

    Colin Williams

    2601 posts

    I don’t know how old you are, but gaining (and expressing) confidence is just a part of maturing. It’s also something you have to actively practice if it’s not coming naturally. I’m damn quiet myself. I went to SXSW 2008 for 4 days and didn’t say a single word to anyone the whole time (well, except the EllisLab guys). I don’t have a problem arguing or holding my own though. That always gets me talking (and typing 😊)

  • #7 / Aug 01, 2008 9:18pm

    Randy Casburn

    997 posts

    In case confirmation is necessary about “I don’t have a problem arguing or holding my own though. That always gets me talking (and typing smile)”—I’ll confirm this.  Hahahhaaahah. Pay back is sweet!  🧛

    Just backing up my dear friend Colin 😉

    Randy

  • #8 / Aug 02, 2008 2:34pm

    gungbao

    70 posts

    - spent less time in the internet & more time in real-life
    - training, training, training
    - staying cool is the first rule
    - staying cool is the second rule
    - always think - before you talk
    - take always care, what you are thinking - coz this is what you will say
    - take care what you say, coz this is what you will do
    - take care, what you are doing, coz this is, what will finally be YOU
    - never argue, when you are “thinking” with your “cochones”
    - trust your instincts more than your brain

    Cheers.

  • #9 / Aug 02, 2008 2:41pm

    Colin Williams

    2601 posts

    “cochones” ?? Haha! :lol:

    I think you mean “cojones.” I think..

  • #10 / Aug 02, 2008 6:32pm

    srobet

    53 posts

    @all :

    wow, really really good tips for me.

    Thanks, and i’ll try it all, also “drunk” :D

  • #11 / Aug 03, 2008 2:51pm

    Derek Allard

    3168 posts

    @Colin: did we get a chance to chat at sxsw?  I met 2 “Colin"s that are coming to mind, and I’m trying to put a face to a name.

    @srobet: Its not for everyone, but my answer is completely sincere - take up a combat sport.  People of all shapes and sizes can learn from something like brazilian jiu jitsu or judo (people at my dojo range from ultra muscular to borderline morbidly obese) and if you’re more into striking you may enjoy boxing or muay thai.  Try to find something you enjoy.  The actual art is probably secondary as you start.

  • #12 / Aug 03, 2008 3:39pm

    Mark Skilbeck

    26 posts

    Confidence comes from being happy with yourself, or atleast with me it did. And female attention is always a confidence booster :D

  • #13 / Aug 03, 2008 5:12pm

    Tom Glover

    493 posts

    Confidence comes from being happy with yourself, or atleast with me it did. And female attention is always a confidence booster :D

    The second is slowly coming to me. lol. And again it does help, but then I have a long time left in my life of programming and real life.

  • #14 / Aug 04, 2008 3:36am

    xwero

    4145 posts

    To learn how to respond quickly you can try to develop a sense of humor. If you can make things funny by putting them in the wrong context just by listening to people and responding, you can do the same in debates. The best thing about humor is that you don’t have to be self confident, you can play the i’m stupid card. But if the humor is clever people will start to listen to you.
    You have to find the little things that sting to build your response on.

  • #15 / Aug 04, 2008 8:31am

    Mark Skilbeck

    26 posts

    Confidence comes from being happy with yourself, or atleast with me it did. And female attention is always a confidence booster :D

    The second is slowly coming to me. lol. And again it does help, but then I have a long time left in my life of programming and real life.

    I feel ya, my friend.

    I still, considering averages of life expectancy for a male living in England (~65 years), have around 48 left to develop and publish an application.

    -relaxed, chilled, cool-

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